Greetings Super PAC Treasure Huntsmen and Huntswomen,
Congratulations on the recent purchase of the Colbert Super PAC Super Fun Pack – or the successful hacking into the email of somebody who has purchased one. If you’ve properly filed your Super PAC paperwork with the FEC and opened a XXL Bank Account, soon you’ll be rolling in cash.
I assume you’ve abandoned all of your classes, family, friends, and personal hygiene habits to focus on the Colbert Super PAC treasure hunt. So far the treasure remains antedelopean – which is a word I assume means “not found.” I can’t be sure about that, though, since my dictionary is antedelopean. Still, a personal appearance by Stephen Colbert at your campus is still within your grasp - especially if you’re currently holding your treasure map!
It has come to my attention that the Official Treasure Hunt rules contain a typo: In the very last paragraph, the word “JURY” is spelled “J2RY.” This is a misprint, and is not part of the puzzle. It’s an understandable mistake; the 2 is very close to the U on the solid gold Executive Power Keyboard that you all will soon be able to afford with your Super PAC money. As an extremely malleable metal, gold makes for a very poor computer peripheral, but on the plus side: it’s shiny!
But if you’ve become stuck in your treasure hunting, take heart! Solving the enclosed word search will help you find the ultimate treasure – self confidence. And also, the real ultimate treasure: actual treasure.
Good luck, and remember, if in your hunt you meet an old crone deep in the forest who offers to cast a spell to help your quest in exchange for your Facebook login name and password - don’t do it! She is not authorized support staff!
Communication Director and Chief Treasure-er
Colbert Super PAC